Patrick Ward, PhD » Transitions / Change

Sharing Custody

Patrick Ward — Tue, 19 Jan 2010 01:21:53 +0000

The children are the ultimate victims of the conflict between the parents. A good analogy is a child in a boat and the parents are on the dock watching. The poor kid’s boat is sinking and the parents argue about who’s going to help and how are they going to help and accusing the other of not being there for the child. While the parents are arguing over these things, the child’s boat sinks and he is really at risk for drowning now. The same thing occurs emotionally for a child when the parents get stuck in a cycle of conflict over child support, visitation schedules, personal vendettas and who said what.

Tips for the Holidays

Patrick Ward — Mon, 16 Nov 2009 03:17:24 +0000

Think about the following questions, and take some time to come up with your answers. What’s most meaningful to you about the holidays? What would your Thanksgiving and Christmas be like if they were truly wonderful? What makes it all worth it? Many say that what makes it wonderful is time to enjoy relationships with family and friends, a time to refocus on what’s really important, celebrating Jesus’ birth, doing good for others, and so on. Continue

Coping with Change

Patrick Ward — Sat, 18 Apr 2009 14:00:53 +0000

Stress often comes in the form of change to our lives. Therefore, it is very important that we learn how to “get a handle” on change so that we can roll with it rather than be rolled over by it. Stress can literally run you over! Did you know that researchers are finding out that emotional stress is associated with increases in heart disease as well as other stress-related illnesses such as irritable bowel syndrome (IBS) and fibromyalgia? Continue

Becoming Parents: Challenging Changes

Patrick Ward — Thu, 13 Dec 2007 17:03:00 +0000

Parenthood is great in many ways. Becoming a parent, however, is a growth process and it takes a lot of learning through trial and error. Bill Cosby says “Having a child is surely the most beautifully irrational act that two people in love can commit.” Those of us who are parents can agree it’s much harder than we thought, but there is also the potential for great joy and happiness as a parent. When I found out that my wife was pregnant the first time, I had only the slightest idea how my life was about to change. Before I had kids of my own, I had some friends who were parents. When I told them we were expecting, these friends – with spit up on their shoulders and crying babies in the background – would grin and say how much they were looking forward to us having a child to take care of. Looking back, I think the grin was more sadistic than celebratory. It’s like they couldn’t wait to see us suffer and stagger through the transition to parenthood. Continue