Giving Thanks

This year marks the 150th anniversary of the national holiday of thanksgiving.  Everyone knows it hearkens back to the pilgrims and Native Americans, but it wasn’t officially deemed a holiday until President Lincoln enacted it at a time when many had little to be thankful for.  Lincoln called for this public day of thanksgiving when the civil war was in full swing and wouldn’t end for another year and a half.  It was actually brought to the public by Lincoln after the exhausting and tragic victory over the south at Gettysburg.  Psychologically, it was a brilliant move on Lincoln’s part. 
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Categories: Faith issues, Holidays, and Personal Growth.

Forgiveness: A Testimonial

Remember the line from the movie “Love Story” that “Love means never having to say you’re sorry?”  What a crock!  John Lennon of the Beatles makes more sense when he explained that “Love means having to say you’re sorry every five minutes.”  Reconciliation and forgiveness are necessary ingredients for any committed couple’s success.  Dr.Terry Hargrave, an internationally recognized expert on forgiveness, says that “Any act of forgiveness should also be accompanied by a change in the victimizer towards trustworthy behavior.”  This means, essentially, that when you have wronged your mate you MUST convey that you are sorry! This is only
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Categories: Faith issues, Family, Marriage, and Personal Growth.

What is Self Esteem?

Self-esteem has gotten a bad rap lately. Some people wonder if kids can have too much self-esteem.  I think it depends on what people mean by “self-esteem.”  If people understand self-esteem to mean that we are all winners all the time and therefore are entitled to praise and adoration no matter what, then YES children can have too much self-esteem.  This kind of unrealistic message creates a sense of entitlement in children that they should be given privileges, praise, and awards for just existing.  The end result of this will be children who lack self-respect, self-discipline, and motivation. To me,
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Categories: Children, Mental Health, and Personal Growth.

Don’t Give Up!

When life has dealt you an unexpectedly bad hand, its natural to have the quitting impulse.  The quitting impulse, when followed through with, is too often a miscarriage of destiny and God’s plans for your life.  This can range from quitting a game before it ends, ending a marriage prematurely, to suicide.    Don’t give up and quit before expending every resource and every option to succeed, to finish well. The Quitter By: Robert Service When you’re lost in the Wild, and you’re scared as a child, And Death looks you bang in the eye, And you’re sore as a boil,
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Categories: Family, Marriage, Mental Health, and Personal Growth.

Adults Need Recess Too!

Yesterday at the office the nurses decided they needed a break.  After they stepped outside for some fresh air, they observed the leaves falling steadily from a nearby tree.  On a whim, they decided to try and see how many leaves they could catch before they fell to the ground.  They were darting around and laughing for about 5 minutes.  Then, they came back inside and went straight to work.  I asked them about it later, and they both said that afterwards they felt mentally and physically refreshed. They were also a lot more cheerful! This break in the daily
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Categories: Mental Health, Personal Growth, and Stress.

Taming the “Me” Monster: Getting out of your Self.

A friend/colleague and I recently had a discussion about motivational speakers and televangelists who try to convince us that we deserve to be happy and are entitled to serenity.  While this is an attractive concept, it can actually rob us from living a full and whole life.  This sounds paradoxical, but really the more we focus on ourselves and our own happiness the more elusive it becomes.  Maybe people don’t know what they are looking for, in fact I’m sure this is often the case.  Henry David Thorough is quoted as follows about happiness: “Happiness is like a butterfly: the
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Categories: Faith issues, Mental Health, Personal Growth, and Stress.

How to Avoid a Nervous Breakdown

We live in a technologically advanced society full of time and labor-saving devices.  So why is it that we often wish for more time and go through our days feeling worn out?  Most of us don’t utilize the time wisely.  We have to-do lists as long as our arms, with limited time and money to accomplish the tasks in front of us. That is actually the definition for chronic stress – the perception that demands or requirements exceed our resources and abilities.  The key word there is “Perception.” When we perceive the demands of life are exceeding what we’ve got
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Categories: Mental Health, Personal Growth, and Stress.

Developing a Roadmap for your Life

The New Year is a time for new starts and re-evaluating our goals.  It’s a time for reflection on how well our lifestyle and life decisions are matching up with what we want out of life.  We only have one lifespan given to us.  We can easily fall into the idea that we have plenty of time to make the necessary changes, but there are no guarantees.  With that thought in mind, take this opportunity to reflect and refocus.  The Roadmap Exercise is a writing activity to identify and clarify your values and goals.  These concepts are the desired destination
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Categories: Personal Growth and Transitions / Change.